Negotiation. Often a heated word but all it is is a discussion aimed at reaching an agreement.

Negotiation doesn’t have to be a zero sum game and it doesn’t have to be stressful. When it comes to negotiating at work, it’s not just about your salary, bonus or other financials. It’s also about things like lifestyle, balance and long term career growth. 

When you take on a new job, whether it’s at a new company or a promotion, it’s an opportunity to negotiate. It’s an opportunity to advocate for yourself, your needs and your wants. After all, you know what you deserve, you know your worth, and you know what is going to make you feel valued*, motivated* and happy*.

*If you don’t know these things you may want to think about if this job, industry and opportunity is right for you. 

Negotiation is a critical step in the process before saying yes or accepting an opportunity. You navigated through an interview process, you proved yourself, and you got the offer. Congrats! Now it’s time to work through the flip side of the coin. Navigating offer terms that meet YOUR needs and not just the companies’. 

Take into consideration things like job tile, management opportunity, working hours, flexibility in hours or work from home, salary, bonus and other financial incentives, benefits, vacation days, and anything else that is important to you or your family's lifestyle. 

Negotiation can often feel like a black or white game if all you are after is some sort of number. My recommendation is to look at what you want holistically. For instance, if what you want is a $20k increase is it really just about the money? Perhaps you want this increase because you feel like your hours are too long, or you never end up using your paid time off, or you feel like you title is incongruent with your responsibility. 

Approach the conversation about the big picture, rather than the solution that YOU think will fix it. Oftentimes a company doesn’t have the budget to offer a financial fix but what they can do is offer something in between. A title change, an opportunity for management or leadership on a big project. Maybe it’s a development track to a new role within the business, or an addition to your vacation days. An extra week of vacation may be of equal or greater value than just plain salary that will be taxed! 

Everytime you accept something, you say yes. When you say yes to one thing, you are saying no to something else. So when you accept something that doesn’t feel completely comfortable you are sacrificing in other areas of your life. 

If you accept a lower title than the responsibility associated with the role, you are sacrificing your potential upward progression for future roles. A head hunter may not find you 12 months from now because they think you are in a lower position than you actually are. 

If you accept a lower salary, you may be saying no to your weekly girls night dinner or your annual savings goals. 

If you accept less vacation days, you may be saying no to time spent with family, vacations with your partner, or the ability to take some extra personal mental health days throughout the year. 

Don’t take no as the final answer. Take no as an opportunity to have a conversation for a way to make it work for both sides. 

When I was the HR lead for the US offices in my last role at a Tech company, I had to unexpectedly move across the country for my partner's job. At the time, I felt so disappointed to leave a job I loved and sacrifice all the upward momentum I'd made during the year of working there. When I asked to relocate, the answer was a firm no. My manager said I need to be where the people are, and that it’s a boots on the ground type of job. 

This just wouldn’t work for me. I knew I wanted to keep my job. I liked the NYC salary (which I couldn’t compete with in CA), I liked the people I worked with and the work I was doing. I took it as an opportunity to negotiate a solution that would work for everyone. It wasn’t black and white to me, I found the shades of gray in between to have a conversation.

I thought about how to make this a success and came up with a few things: 

• I would propose my idea as a pilot this way the business can back out of it if it isn’t working, and I have an opportunity to prove myself and make it work. It’s a no pressure solution. 

• I would need my key stakeholders to buy into this change before I got my manager and the executive team to sign off on it. I would need to do everything I could to make it easy for my manager to get on board and aligned so that she can go to bat for me for executive sign off.

• This would need to be a zero cost to the business - I will fund my own travel to ensure I still have boots on the ground as this was the leading reason for why my manager initially said no. 

• I would adjust my working hours to 6am - 3pm pacific time so that I can continue to cover 9-6 EST.  

• I would present the benefits of working from home and having a virtual HR presence (this is pre-covid so the idea was quite radical!) I positioned the move as a positive, rather than a risk. 

Fast forward 4 years later, I was able to work from home, earn promotions, and grow my career. I didn’t take no for an answer, and instead, took it as an opportunity to negotiate a solution that worked for everyone. 

Remember, that when you accept and say yes, you need to feel confident about it. If you have doubts or an itching concern, open the door for a conversation and negotiate what you deserve!